The year 2022 is drawing to a close and I look back exhausted on a wild roller coaster ride: curves that are fun, descents that are scary. Loops that I sometimes find cool and sometimes extremely unpleasant. I take it all in — lament the lows and celebrate the highs. And I feel like I’m getting rid of a good portion of ballast. My self-awareness sharpens and my level of consciousness rises. In this mode, I make new decisions and change the plot of my life. Because it’s about breaking out of the hamster wheel of repetitive loops to feel my own self-efficacy.
This year’s experiences have once again made it clear that there are two paths we can take in challenging moments:
Path 1 is the path of the aching heart. We have been walking this well-trodden path for many years. We know it like the back of our hand. This is where our negative experiences and painful beliefs lie, making us unable to act as we are in the middle of the repetition pattern. When we are in this energy, our mind is stuck rewinding the same programme over and over again. We shimmy from one destructive thought to the next. There is no liberation on this path. We go round in circles and reliably produce the same results — with an aching heart.
Path 2 is the path of self-determination. We wake up and see things as they are – realistic and expectation-free. We feel that we have no control. And yet we are happy and curious about what is to come. Because we can engage with the moment and recognise the beauties around us: a touching song, a special exchange with a colleague, a smiling baby, a delicious dinner. There is kindness and devotion in everything. Our thoughts come and go and we can let each one be without fight. Because every day we can decide for ourselves who we want to be today.